Sammy's

I met Evander Holyfield tonight.

The man's ear looks great. He's shorter than I thought he would be. Most celebrities are. Of course he had some pretty good looking babes with him, and a small entourage. I wish I had a digital camera. I thought about taking a pic on my camera phone, but it was too dark.

Anyway I was at a place called Sammy's. Sammy apparently was an old singer at the Gallant Knight. He, like MLK, had a dream. That dream was to have his own place one day. So he left the Knight and opened Sammy's. The place was packed. Too packed. I took Anca's advice and didn't wear a t-shirt tonight. Good thing, because I would have built a massive sweat.

I liked the music. I saw some friends who I hadn't seen in years. It was my friend Francis's birthday party. A good time was had by all. But my ears hurt. Those guys from the Knight ans Sammy's play some loud fucking music. Goodness. Anyway, it was fun. But I am sticking to the Knight.

New girls: 1
New numbers: 0
Outlook: A little shaky. The upcoming week is mildly critical. White girls, you perplex me.

An Awkward Situation

This is a random thought I had on the drive home from my friend's place today.

Invariably at this age when you meet people a natural question is what they do. Do they work? Are they in school? Etc. I am in an awkward situation. I hate having to explain - well, I just left investment banking and I'm not working now but I am applying to school but I don't know if I'll work because I don't really need to. Ugh. Frustrating. Anyone have any ideas how to simplify my explanation without sounding like a lazyass?

The Groove

The Gallant Knight with Klock Work on the stage is amazing. Hands down
the best times I've ever had in Houston have been at the Knight. And
last night I got tore up. Chris says he's never seen me that way. I'm
starting to find some more things about myself that I had forgotten
over the past few years. Dancing is fun and I like to do it. When
college started I was all about going out and dancing. I'm no Justin
Timberlake and I don't have a whole lot of moves but I've always
received compliments about the times ladies have had dancing with me.
For some reason I hit a spot where I wasn't as interested in dancing.
I'd rather sit to the side, post up and drink my drink. People would
try to get me to dance, and I'd tell them no, i can dance, but i dont
dance. The past two fridays at the Knight have really opened me up. I
cant help to think about why I stopped dancing. Why did dancing lose
its fun to me? Was it my dance partner?

Friday night served another purpose for curing my ills. Thursday night
Stacie called. I picked up. Still need to get the china. She of
course was thinking about me and wanted to check up on me. It was good
at first but we talked for entirely too long. Things got a little
emotional. So many times I thought about taking her for a ride. 'oh
yeah, i'll take you back....leave you on the altar' This aint my style.
She is still trying to talk me into something, not right away, but she
really wants me to keep it open. She knows I'm not over her. She's
right, but I told her that I was clear. I knew my situation and I know
that her and I will never have that relationship again. She doesn't
want me to be clear but its the truth. I had to tell her now. I'm
past all the anger with her. I forgive her for what she did. I will,
however, make no effort at reconciliation. She has to know this. I'm
not going to drag her through more than what she's given herself.

The Knight helped me in this way. I danced. I took my mind off of the
heartache, off of Stacie, and had a wonderful time. I didn't sit to
the side, posted up, drinking the night away. I mixed it up. I
fratenized with the ladies and had the after party at my house. I
don't remember some of the things I did but my room was messed up when
the sun came up. Hang overs suck but times like that are too good not
to have a little pain afterwards. Glad I wasn't the one at work by 8
this morning.

"i dont care what you do, i'm getting out..no nothing ever shames me."

The Gallant Knight

There isn't a need for a creative title to this blog. It is what it is. For the second night in a row, I should not have driven home, but I did anyway. No hook up tonight, but a good story nonetheless.

Logan convinces me to go to the Gallant Knight, this dive bar/club somewhere in Houston. I've been wanting to go for the past 12 months, and I finally make it.

This place rocks.

I couldn't believe it. I thought it would be some gigantic bar scene with a bunch of posers. Turns out the $10 cover charge really is a good filter. Logan picks up my cover. I love you man. There is a band. The name is Klock Work. I like Klock Work. They rock work. Like clock work.

I go with Logan's roomates Philip, Craig, Matt and friends Craig, Mario, Mike D (who is moving to Alabama soon - the outing tonight was in his honor), Laura, and Janelle. It's a good time. Mixed crowd, both racially and agewise.

I spat the initial stages of game to Janell. She wasn't really feeling it. But that's ok. I have a big ass pile of game to draw from. I'm pretty aggressive. My good friend Kristin calls me the 2nd most sexually agressice guy she knows. Second only to a guy who makes regular appearances on HBO's Real Sex series. Not much aggression tonight. There was a half black, half asian girl in the club tonight who was BANGIN'. I didn't know what to do. Froze up again. Dammit. Whatever, I'm rich.

I can't wait to hit that spot again. I was pleased to see the older women there. That's so hot. 34 year-old's don't fuck around. They give it to you straight. I like that. I lost my ring about a month ago. Tiffany silver mesh. I need another one. It's hot. I'm going to Austin tomorrow. Hook 'em, bitches.

Girls met: 0
Numbers: 1 - but it doesn't count. It was Laura's. Nothing against her, but I know who she is. No game spit to get it.
Outlook: I still can't believe I nailed an asian girl last night. That was a great moment in hookup history.

Poser

Women make the best wingmen. Hands down. They do all the work and they don't even know it. I shouldn't give myself much credit. I do talk a good game, but it's not great. It's better than that of Wes and Neahmiah, but it's not stellar. Oh well.

And yes, she knew the deal.

In other news I had 2 dreams last night. First, that I was back in my investment banking job and was put on a shitty project that would require me to be there all night. Second dream was that I was flew to Chicago and was attacked by dogs. Anyone care to explain this?

Team America - Fuck Yea

5'1", 105, bronze. Asian. Hot. Spicy. Exotic. Lisa, not Lisa Chang, just for clarification.

I had help, but it looks like the game is back. I had a wingwoman. The hot Romanian. I love you!! Holy shit. I have to excuse myself because I've been drinking and I type slow as shit. I'm also on the phone with my homegirl Brenna. I told her last night that if she were to draw her name it would be a perfect color spectrum. It would be like red to pink to white. Whatever, it's an inside joke.

Anyway, I'm at the bar. Sitting outside. Country music blasting in my ear. I feel out of place. So I start talking to this girl, who initially asks why I took so long talking to her. I say it's because I wasn't ready. She says I play it cool. I do play it cool. I am a smooth ass motherfucker. I spit game. She swallows. She says, "I'm going to close my tab, let's go inside." I think to myself, "It can't be this easy."

It is this easy.

My wingwoman leaves. We leave. I discover she's also 3 weeks out of a relationship. Her hood is pierced. I wreck. I come back. I close my tab. I go home and talk to Brenna. It's a great convo. I can't wait to go to vegas. Holy shit. I'm hungry. Leslie texted me tonight. She's sending my shit. The divorce is settled. I am sad.

I am human. I am recovering. I love you.

Mixed Emotions

A little history here. I met Les in the fall of 2001. I was an RA in the brand spanking new San Jacinto dormitory and she happened to be a resident. I liked her from the start. Don't know what it was, but I just liked her alot. It's almost a full 4 years later, and I still really feel the same way. I think about this girl a lot every day, but something has seemed to change recently...

I'm known to all my friends as someone who is always in control of his emotions. I rarely get visually flustered or openly frustrated. To be cliche, I am calm, cool, and collected. I'm always the person that tries to diffuse a tense situation. This isn't to say that I always avoid conflict, but I would rather disable a bomb than see it explode.

Perhaps it is because I've left investment banking and don't work now that I think about my relationship a lot, probably more than what is healthy. But part of me has actually started to get angry at Leslie. Even though I genuinely want to be very good friends with her, I get these extreme bursts of anger that make me want to hate her. I don't know what to do about that. One can see how this is frustrating. I want to know if this is normal. How in the world could I want to hate someone who I have liked or loved every day for the past 4 years? That can't be normal, can it?

I'm glad I dated this girl. I feel that I was a bit of a late bloomer when it came to serious relationships. I'd dated girls before, but none of them were serious at all. Stupid, stupid relationships. I consider, therefore, Leslie to be the first girl I fell in love with - my first love fi you will. But inevitably I have to ask myself if dating her was a good decision or not. Despite the amount of heartache I have experienced recently, I have to say I am glad to have been with her. I liked getting her random gifts "just because." I liked going through airport security because it meant I would see Les shortly thereafter. I didn't mind being tired at work one morning because it meant I had a wonderfully long conversation with Les the night before. I didn't care that many friends spoke out against dating her because she was so far away. It was worth it. Every minute, every airline mile, every movie, every dinner, every trip, every shopping excursion, every evening stayed in, every mobile-to-mobile call, every piece of jewelry, every bouquet of flowers, everything. I grew emotionally and matured as a person. Some philosopher said it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.

I have come to believe this.

Rethinking The Mission

Logan and I had a short chat yesterday about the direction of this blog. My initial purpose was to tell stories about meeting new women. The problem is that the opportunity presents itself generally 2 (maybe 3) days a week, so the blog would be boring. Then I decided that I would talk about relationships in general and get a second view from my friend. Now we've decided the best focus for this blog is no focus at all. This means it will be a forum for us to express opinions / thoughts on a variety of topics. It will be a journal of sorts. For my part, I have a lot of views on a lot of subjects, but there probably will be a common thread on the mechanics of successful and unsuccsessful relationships, because I feel like it's an important topic to me right now. I don't know what Logan plans to do, but whatever it is will be a value add to this blog.

Lessons in Life - LG

I'm a dreamer. I like dreaming. Love dreaming.  But sometimes they can really screw with your head.  I feel for anyone who constantly has nightmares.  That would be absolutly awful.  Most of time mine are great.  Sometimes I've had dreams that foreshadowed different events.  The way something happened was not the same but the end result was exact.  So I'm wary of dreams I have sometimes.  Obviously during these times my dreams are going to hit different nerves and last night hit a new one. 

 

Last night I was faced with how I would react when coming face to face with the scum.  The piece of trash that two-faced his 'friends' and did it so dispicable that many, many people think and know that he deserves an ass kickin.  He needs his ass beaten!  But we don't do that.  We are above men of his kind, if we can call him a man at all.  So, what do I do?  And that is what I thought about as I got ready for work and up to the minute I turned on my computer. 

 

I learned from my father in recent weeks, something he learned at church.  Mom has usually been the one to do the preaching (love em both), so this caught me a little of gaurd.  He said "You can't have reconciliation without forgiveness, but you can have forgiveness without reconciliation."  This answers my question.  I do no harm.  Although the desire would be strong when that day comes that we meet again, I would do no harm.  To forgive I would have to let my anger subside and I'm not ready to do that.  It's not going to happen in the near future.  The same can be said for my ex-fiance.  I mean her no harm.  She's done enough to herself, and if history repeats itself (which it does) she'll do it again...to someone else.  Kuddos to who ever knows the lyrics, let me know if you know the song.

 

"i'd rather be...i'd rather be with an animal"

Reality

It has been rougly a week since I started this blog, and in that week I have received a great deal of criticism (a little praise, but mostly criticism) on the blog. I have to admit that the criticism has weighed on my conscience. It's because I really respect the opinion of those who have expressed disapproval that I have decided to clean up the blog. You'll notice that Cruel Intentions part 1 and 2 (aka Sequels Are Always Worse) are now gone. Someone called it mysogynistic, which is clearly incorrect. No part of this blog supresses women, even in the least bit, and I'd challenge anyone to argue (coherently) that it does. Other criticisms have been that it's tacky, which is probably true. But the biggest criticism came from my friend Brenna...

I had a fairly long conversation with her last night (just over 3 hours), and we talked about the blog a bit. She said that if she didn't know me and read the blog, she'd probably hate me. I was floored. I'm not this type of person. Most of my friends know this (after all, they are my friends for a reason). That was the biggest incentive to refocus this thing.

Brenna also told me something that it proving to be a gigantic pill to swallow. She pontificated that it is virtually impossible to get over someone in any time period shorter than roughly a year. I respect and trust her opinion, so it's hard for me to say she's flat out wrong. I'd guess I'd like to believe that I am capable of getting over someone much sooner, especially since I buy into the notion that the best way to get over someone is to meet someone else. The problem is that the "someone else" could be the "rebound" person. Because of this, I have decided that I will not date anyone, because it would be incredibly wrong to lead a girl on as if you like her and know all along that she's just filling a convenience void. I still think it's ok to hook up with different people. Granted, many women tend to get attached (I really do think I am a decent looking guy and my personality is what attracts people to me) more easily than guys, so I would need to develop an understanding of the situation with any girl I wanted to get with. I really don't want to hurt people. No one deserves to be hurt because of something that I am going through.

Anyway, I hope this helps to set some things straight. I want more people to comment. Our friend Laura just mailed in a comment, which was very much appreciated.

Sunday Sunday Sunday! - by Logan

Today hasn't been my best. Although I have seen for the first time the San Jacinto Monument standing taller than Washington's in DC (Texas was once its own nation if you didn't know), my day has been clouded.

Last night I ran into one of Stacie's best friends from college at a party. Of course, she wanted to know how i was doing, and I obliged digging into how its done, its over. I stood strong and showed how things have to be. I cannot, for any reason, ever, get involved with her again. Now, this is the test. Can I talk about these things and still have a great time? I did! Surrounded by people from college that I haven't seen or talked to in over a year was a relief. With the Blazers I feel so much respect, the best feeling to me, the feeling that I am respected by those I respect. (Brother Blazers, you're all my heros.)

The trouble began in a dream I had last night while passed out on the couch, a dream rife with jealousy. I woke up in a cold sweat and loathed the night. For the better part of the day so far, my head has been clouded in thought. How could she do this to me? How does she continue to act so selfishly during this? How could I ever trust and love such a person again? Basically, today was another trip with heartache. There's more ahead, I know, but they all suck. I go back to what I told Priya "She doesnt love me. She's just feeling the lonliness from not having me there." I'll let Chris tell what he showed Priya if he wants. I leave with this: "Feeling that someone elses loss is greater eases the pain like aloe on a sunburn, but morphine type relief comes from female accompaniment. (better run to the store)

Happy Birthday CHRIS! Welcome to 24, may the first half of yours treat you better than mine."i may be shattered, a little scattered. what does it matter? no one has a fit like i do"

The Newest Member

My name is Logan. College friend of Chris, who has suffered the heartache, white male 24, a CPA and worth the time. Voted most friendly in high school if that means anything. I will be posting from time to time to give everyone another persepective, another personality to identify with. A quickie about my situation: On July 4th, the monday after I buried my grandmother, I found out that my fiance (wedding was Oct 22) was cheating on me, including the day we laid grandma to rest. I took my ring back and called it off. Due to the extent of the 'fling' and the actions of Stacie in the days following, even today almost a month after, I've come to understand that Stacie is NOT the woman that I'm to marry. I'm too good for her. I'm too good for that and I'm not the person to look down on anyone, except those that classify themselves as 'low lifes' through their actions. For my first blog, I ask you to define IRONY. Stacie moved to Houston to be with me (no other friends here) and cheats on me with a person i welcomed into my home as a friend..now I live in a bachelor pad (thank the Lord I hadn't moved in already) surrounded by friends and family all ready to come to my aid because of the atrocities committed against me. She is by herself, ALONE, in a city she's known only since October. For the road ahead. I'm one of the other guys heading to vegas so be ready beacause however emotional, raunchy (come on its vegas), fun, ect this spot will be 100% real for these are the words of two friends, living two degrees of heartache and running a savage burn through our mid twenties with no strings but our own primative needs. Food, water, a few hours sleep, and the need to be sexed. Hey, I was engaged but that doesn't mean I forgot how to seal the deal. (one deal sealed by the way, can't let chris have all the fun) And besides, who's to tell me that I can't get some for myself? i am i am i said im not myself....i'm not dead and i'm not for sale

Double Down

My friend Logan has decided he wants to be a part of this blog. So, of course, I am letting him post. Logan is a strapping young accountant for a major firm, and has a lot to share on this topic.

Urgent Message (The First Dissidents)

Most of you who read this probably got the link from my thefacebook.com profile. That's pretty much how I wanted it. You'll also notice that I have a little innocent line in my profile which basically counts the number of different hook-ups I've has since my breakup. At least three of you (maybe more) has taken issue with this, arguing that it is immature, the wrong way to handle a breakup blah blah blah. I have 4 comments about this...

1st, I would like to thank all of you for voicing your opinion on this. I figured this blog would not sit well with some (maybe many, but who knows), but thats a risk I am willing to take (by the way, if you really know me, you know I'm not like this)

2nd, I know what the hell I am doing. Yes, part of me is hurt so a natural reaction is to try to hurt someone back. It isn't best to fight fire with fire, but I choose to ignore that maxim at the moment

3rd, we ALL do this shit after a major event like a breakup. Don't bitch at me because I have the balls to write about it. Stop being a hypocrite. (this argument contains a naturalistic fallacy, for you lawyers out there)

4th, let's not forget that this is temporary. I beg everyone to read the very first post. So while it may be wrong, insulting, etc, on many levels, I intend to clean it up. However, remember that the blog is really meant to be funny and interesting as it takes me through my experiences meeting people. This is not meant to be some softcore get-all-up-in-Chris's-sexual-business blog. It's supposed to be fun.

Wild Wild West

This is a better post than the last one.

For the past week and a half, I have begun talking to my friend Brenna. Brenna is from somewhere in west Texas, but goes to a large university in central Texas. I met her when I was a senior in college, but didn't know her very well. We went to a foam party one night, and I found the new phenomenon (white women with ass) before Ludacris did. Even before I began to date Leslie, who I may add is also blessed with that feature.

Anyway, I never got to know her very well in college, but I knew enough to know she is a cool girl. So I have been talking to her about various stuff for a while. She is a great dancer, which I like because I have not met many women who dance very well. Good dancers are hot. White girls who are good dancers are hotter because you don't find many of them who aren't strippers.

My sexual/relationship psychology friend, let's call her Double D, says I may be trying to get into a relationship to get over Les. She's pretty right on about most of this stuff, and we agree on a lot, and I do think that she may be on to something. But hopefully I am not trying to replace my ex (though I will say I really have not ever met a girl like Les in my ENTIRE life, for reasons I do not care to explain here, but will openly share with anyone who wants to know). The verdict is still out on that one.

Brenna is accompanying me and two other friends in a trip to Las Vegas in August. Needless to say, I am excited. I really look forward to developing a good friendship with her and maybe more. If nothing happens, at least I have a good dance partner.

The Social Experiment

This entry is just weird, so read at your own risk.

Ok, so in what is perhaps a feeble and admittedly puerile stunt to meet girls, I have posted several online personal ads on various websites. Now, I have heard all the bullshit about how great of a guy I am, how any girl would be lucky to have a guy like me, how I am so sweet, cute, blah blah blah. All this, execpt I'm not her type. I want to ask sometimes, "Honey, what IS your type?" So anyway I thought it may be fun. So one of the sites (and this is where this post just gets weird) is an adult personals site. Some of these people are scary. Many women are pretty fucking hot, but I feel a little dirty (ok really REALLY dirty) writing these erotic e-mails to these women trying to get them to have a random hookup in the middle of the day in a Galleria store dressing room. But it is a first. I'm just pissed I paid $60 for it and I havent hooked up yet. Tonight someone actually e-mailed me (and then called me out of nowhere). Turns out she was not hot. The girl could barely fucking speak english. So I thanked her for applying, then hung up.

I feel more and more like an idiot talking about this. So I'll stop. I think I'd like to hook up with regular girls, not freaks I meet online. That's just gross. It's 12:40am and I have a big day of doing nothing tomorrow, so I think I'll watch Swingers and then go to bed.

First night out

I have not been out in Houston in a long ass time. Not since at least late May. So it was not without some hesitation that I agreed to go out to this place called Rich's last Thursday. For those of you not familiar with this place, it is normally a gay club, that turns straight on Thursdays. It's also 18 and up. I have really forgotten the appeal of the 18 year old female. But I have also forgotten how to talk to women. Ridiculous. Seriously, I froze up. Like a little bitch. But not for long, because my friend alcohol came along and all caution was thrown to the wind. But no catches that night.

Girls met: 2
Numbers: 0
Outlook: Neutral

The Beginning

Ok, this blog is meant to detail the adventures I go through on the way to my next girlfriend. Recently, I got out of a 15-18 month relationship (I'm unclear on how long Leslie would say it was. There were 3 months of vagueries). It was long distance (I am Houston, she is Kansas City) and it worked. We racked up a lot of airplane miles. She says her desire to be single led to the break-off. I hate that reason. I hate to generalise, but I think any girl would prefer a good relationship to being single. Hell, even most guys would. Who likes feeling pressure to meet people at bars? Certainly not most. Anyway, I'm going to detail my experiences going out, meeting people, etc in what hopefully will be a catalog of interesting experiences! Everyone please comment! This is not meant to hurt Leslie. She is a great, great, great girl and, more than anything in this world, I really do hope we get back together. But I feel I have to do this for myself. I don't even know if she reads this.

A little about me which will help explain some things. I am 5'7.5" (5'8 on a good morning or in shoes). I am 23, will be 24 on the 31st. I am a huge fan of interracial relationships (my ex is white; every girl I have been with is either white or hispanic). I am legitimately a nice guy. I discovered this in MAN 326 class at Texas. I think I am an ESTJ (personality profile) or some shit like that. The point is I invest A LOT into my relationships, be they romantic or otherwise, which explains some of the things I do.

I will use real names in this blog, unless directed not to do so. Nothing incriminating, but I intend to keep it real. I am including the good and the bad.