Saturday Night in Austin, Texas

In the second part of a post-midterm drinking double header weekend, I went to 6th street last night. As was usual, I went to 6th street with friends from grad school and friends from undergrad. As was also the normal case, we all drank a lot. Jaeger bombs, beers, jello shots, the usual.

A visit to the club Spill is becoming more of an occurrence during nights on 6th. There's dancing undergraduate girls, good drinks (and pretty decent service, too), but it's crowded as all hell, so it makes for the perfect last-stop/last-resort/if-you're-gonna-hook-up-but-don't-know-who-with-yet-then-go-here kind of place.

Spill was great, but its two events that ensued my trip to Spill that I'd like to highlight. One these is fucking infuriating. I'll be blunt: I'm sick of getting hit on by unattractive girls. Seriously, look at who I roll with, look at my style and make some assumptions. Look, I'm not a vain guy at all (you all know this or should have figured it out by now). In fact, looks mean less to me than they do to most other people. But I'm gonna fuckin lose it the next time a busted girl comes up to me telling me she like how I look, "thinks I'm fly", wants my number, etc, and then tells me she has a 1-year old at home. I don't care. Don't talk to me!!

Second, and this is kind of funny, but I've been reintroduced to the concept of "strongarming" a girl. Remember I talked about this some time ago in one of my posts. Strongarming refers to the physical practice of "escorting" a girl somewhere by grabbing onto her arm. Harmless, right?

Wrong.

WRONG.

In what may go down as the most agressive deal closing (if you can even call it that) in Gulf Coast history, my friend Big EZ bypassed all small talk, flirting, and probably foreplay by strongarming his way to ass (Chinese style, for added strength) last night. Literally, this is how it went down:

2:56am: get back to Big EZ's place
3:12am: the girls walk in (aside: we hadn't talked to any of the new girls while on 6th, even though they were with us), and Big EZ starts making shots like there's no tomorrow...he's on a mission...
3:20am: I change into PJs...brother is weary
3:23am: KW's boyfriend locks her out of his room. He has to be at work at 7:45.
3:24am (28 minutes after getting back from 6th having not talked to these girls AT ALL while there): Kate is still trying to get into her bf's room, I'm watching TV, and out of nowhere I see Big EZ "coaxing" this chick into his room. The grip on this chick's arm was classic. It was going down. KW was drunk and emotional (why do girls get all pissy and start crying at the drop of a hat when they're trashed?), but EZ had bigger fish to fry. The story ends here. See diagram.


Important lessons from the night: they will come to you. Just wait.