On this (relatively mundane) Sunday evening at home, I've decided to spend (waste) two hours of my life watching the Miss Texas USA pageant hoping/wishing/praying/pleading for one of these super-hot-but-probably-not-very-smart girls to have a Ms. South Carolina moment. In case you forgot (how could you ever forget this?!), here it is:
In what can only be strangely described as a half-amazing, half-awful experience, I believed I have discovered the Houston version of Spill, the bar/club I frequented in Austin. It's call iBar, and it's the dirtiest place on the Houston social landscape I've ever seen. If this place doesn't sound familiar to most of you, fret not. You're not out of the loop, it's that iBar is relatively new, as it recently replaced the Grasshopper club at 506 Main.
Naturally, I had to investigate this atrocity (at least it was free cover). My suspicions were confirmed as true when I walked it, saw few people over the age of 22, a bunch of obviously underage chicks drinking and well on their way to intoxication and/or roofie slippage (the guys in this place were not on the up-and-up). I ordered up what turned out to be a terrible vodka tonic (this always happens when I order a drink with house liquor, I should know better), which was so terrible I didn't finish it.
The bright side? The girls are easily approachable. Seems like if you come across as even a halfway decent individual (i.e. you finished high school and have a job), you're in. Chris likes low standards.
While I don't think I'll be hitting up iBar again anytime soon, it was useful to cross it off my list of places to go downtown.
In other news, Big EZ (aka Strongarm Simpson) and I are throwing the first of what will eventually be a series of sweet parties at our apartment in Dallas later this summer. Details and invitations will come your way soon.
Finally, I don't know why I think this is cool, but evidently I need to vacation to Cape Cod this summer. Seems alot of people are having fun there these days...
This past Friday, driven by my desire to be social, I went out with a few friends to a couple of bars in Houston. As is typical when a group of dudes (there were four of us on this night, actually it's pretty typical for my anyway, regardless of whom I come to the bar with, chicks or guys) rolls into a bar/club, I immediately rushed the bar, ordered some initial libations, and began making small talk with my friends. Obviously, this small talk is just that, largely a time suck while we cruise the landscape looking for potential lottery winners (I'll explain this concept later). At this first bar, I noticed a particularly undesirable situation brewing just about 10 feet from me. An unfortunate soul was being given a stiff Heisman by the bitch girl he was talking to. Clearly he was being dissed, but the funny part of this sequence was how painfully obvious the girl made it that she wasn't interested in talking.
I kind of felt bad for the dude (I perhaps should add this was guy a fairly good looking black guy and the girl was a very average white chick; my entire diatribe on that subject is coming in a future post) because he was simply playing a wingman role while his friend (a pudgy, older douchebag wearing a white linen shirt and pants) hit on a totally busted chick (she was huge).
Anyway, back to the wingman. After probably 5 or 10 minutes of forced/awkward/uneasy conversation, this chick, perhaps subconsciously, starts doing everything from physically turning her body away from the guy, tapping her friend on the shoulder (while she's being hit on by the other guy) to talk to her, chain smoking a cigarette, making 3 trips to either the bar or bathroom, clearly scoping out other people in the bar, checking her cell phone/blackberry/iphone. It was terrible; the ultimate diss for a (preusmably nice) guy trying to be a good friend and wingman.
So I decided to come back to SL for the bulk of the summer before moving to the Dallas/Fort Worth metrosexualplex late next month. Since there's nothing to do here and I needed to get back into shape, it naturally followed that I joined a gym. So I did - a "grown up" gym, as opposed to a gym you'd find on major college campuses (read: UT - Austin, home of the most beautiful coeds outside of the SEC - vanderbilt not included). To be frank, I'm a bit disappointed with the workout environment (admittedly for all the wrong reasons). For one, the chicks are unbelievably unattractive. I know, I know, I've been spoiled by reasonably good-looking 18 to 22-year olds working out on campus. But give me a freaking break. You'd think there would be at least a few good looking cougars (this is SL for Christ's sake!!!). But there's nothing. I even try going around 6 or 7 (after works). Again, I'm coming up empty, and it's terribly disappointing.
My second observation should seem obvious, but again, coming from a college campus, it was a little startling: the people in my "grown up" gym are legitimately out of shape. They jiggle their "wobbly bits" all over the place. And they're super insecure about it. I don't understand this. I also don't understand people trying to multitask while they're on the treadmill, for example. While I realize that watching TV or reading a magazine/book during exercise may help pass the time, I will never understand the lady who elects to talk on her freaking cell-phone while grinding through a session on the elliptical. The first time I saw this, I thought it was an anomaly, but apparently some conversations can't wait.
Finally, I'm convinced some people don't know how to dress for the gym. I've seen more people wearing full-length khakis, a polo shirt, and doc martens during a workout than I care to count. I almost want to remind them they're in a fitness facility, will probably sweat (you're not getting that good of a workout if you're on a cell phone), and need different attire. People are dumb.
In any event, I enjoy my gym. It's never crowded so I never have to wait for a station, and the people are nice. To top it off, if I'm ever having a bad day, they're always something comical I can find about the people without having to look too far.
In other news, a friend started a blog which is going to be very good. I'd like each of you to check it out: http://mikepemulis.blogspot.com/
That's it.
